Liz is sitting here by me feeding our little Lola-bug as I type this. We haven't gotten much sleep this week, but then again, we haven't had a good night sleep since 2006. Sometimes I ask people who don't have little kids to tell me tales of "sleeping through the night" while I sit at their feet in disbelief. "What mythical creature is this..."alarm clock"? You mean a machine wakes you up?!"
Those of you who have read this blog for more than a couple weeks know there's 2 things I rarely am, and they're both "serious." But, today I wanted to share this glimpse with all of you, something that is very sacred and special to me. It's a video I made of Lola's birthday.
How do you capture the million emotions of waiting to bring a child into the world? Anxiety, nervousness, fear, anticipation....peace. We often talk about a curtain being placed over our eyes when we come to this Earth, something that makes us forget who we are, where we came from, who we were with. If we took that knowledge with us to this life, what would be the point?
A few times, sacred times, that curtain is thin. Very thin. So thin that for a brief moment there is no difference between the heavens and the earth. You feel the presence of our Creator, family members who have passed on before us....family members who have yet to join us. I think if we're lucky, we'll get maybe just a couple of those experiences in this lifetime that will feel almost like deja-vu. Our eyes will be opened from this mortal life...a life that is hard. Life that is stressful. Life that thickens our skin and makes us cynical and unsure of who we are. Last Tuesday at 5:11pm and the hours leading up to that moment, that curtain was thin, and all who were present could sense it.
Liz and I have dear friends who cannot, for some reason or another, bring children into this world. They are wonderful people who have cried their share of tears from this. They deserve just as much as anyone the chance to experience it. I don't know why we can when others cannot. All I know is they will, someday, and it may not be in this life but when they do it will be just as special and sacred a moment as ever.
I have a deep gratitude for what my wife has gone through for our family, and for all of you mothers, both current and one-day-will-be mothers who are reading this. I wasn't sure if this was too special to me to share with you all, but something told us we should. I've turned off the comments because I just want you to enjoy it. If you really would like to tell me what you thought, I'd love to hear from you. (firstname.lastname@example.org)